I need a break from life...
I feel like I should just kick everyone I see in the freaking head. All I want to do is rest and relax for ONE WEEK in my little miserable life, and not have to worry about anything except the next time I'm going to go out and have a great time. Is that too much to ask for?
The birthday was a sort-of blast, sort-of bust. Thanks to all the people that made it a blast. A punch in the face to all thsoe who made it a bust.
Finally started losing weight. Again. I wonder how long I'm going to go this time...? Hopefully until I reach my target weight. I've been told that it's better to do a lot of short-term goals rather than one long-term goal. A doctor told me to try to lose 5 lbs a month. It's a good steady rate, but somehow not fast enough. I just need to drop all this 'depression' weight. It's just making me more depressed. UGH. I was doing so well too, even at +20 lbs (of my best weight, not my target weight). Now that I'm +60, it just fucking sucks.
My unbreakable addiction...
I have a problem.
I am engrossed in consumer culture. And I am poor. Not poor because I don't make money; poor because I
waste money.
Let us take, for example, my earnings from last semester. I worked at an engineering company the whole semester (16 weeks), 42 hours/week (give or take), and made $15/hour. (I also worked at a video game store in December, minimum wage, about 8 hrs/week.) You can calculate it if you want to.
Guess how much money I ended the semester with? About $1200. Doesn't that make you
sick? It makes me sick. I don't live in an extravagant apartment (on the contrary, I live in the ghetto), I carpooled with my friends to work so gas wasn't horrible, and utilities weren't horribly high.
So where did all my money go?
Clothes. Video games. CDs. DVDs. Going out to eat EVERY DAY. It's horrible. All because I feel the need to spend what I earn, instead of thinking ahead and saving what I earn. Honestly, I'm only 21, but I need to think about retirement. But more importantly and closer, paying for school, paying my rent, and keeping my car running. Or paying for anything important that might come up (endless doctor visits for my knee, randomly getting sick, my stupid brain problem).
I think I need a budget. I've never tried it, but people that use them (in whatever method necessary) seem to be doing better off pretty quickly. It might be easier to do a budget this spring, since I'll go back down to making $8.50, 20 hours a week as a tutor, plus the video game store. Not making much money = not spending much money. So... cheers to that.
[Side note: this was NOT my New Year's resolution. I had to stop my resolution by order of my orthopedic doctor.]
Life
First, thank you for the feedback on my post about girls.
Second... life is (or will become) very busy. Don't be sad if I don't post much! :)
